And the winner is...

After much deliberation, we have chosen a winner for our "So You Know You can Dance" dance contest!

Meet Callie Bishop. Callie majored in dance in college and she is a local yoga instructor, but you may know her better as the current Miss Wyoming USA. She has a dazzling smile and a positive outlook in life that radiates in her gentle demeanor and her soft moves as she dances.

Because of her affiliation with the Miss USA organization, we have decided to push our campaign forward a couple of months so she can finish her reign and her schedule becomes more open. I am so excited about working with this courageous, graceful, full-hearted woman!

And if you participated and sent us a video, make sure to check your email for a discount so you can have your own session with us. Because everybody need to #existinphotos.

When Things Fall Apart

'Life is a good teacher and a good friend. Things are always in transition, if we could only realize it.  Nothing ever sums itself up in the way that we like to dream about'. - Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart

My world is falling apart. Again. But this time, I had a realization. And it was huge: It occurred to me that life is constantly falling apart; sometimes in grandiose ways and sometimes with almost imperceptible ripples. And then I put it together again. And then it falls apart. Again.

This pointed me in the direction of the root of my suffering: trying to stop things from falling apart! I can't. I need instead to focus on learning the lesson that the falling apart is trying to teach me, and face the habitual patterns that are invoking some of those major melt downs.

 I will be 40 next year. I tell myself that at this age I shoulda coulda woulda, but all that does is put me down when I see that I haven't didn't am not. Maybe that wasn't the path for me. Maybe there are reason why I am not there, some that I can work with and some that are totally out of my control. I have this idea that you can "manipulate" your life (and yourself), that you can make your life be whatever you want it to be if you care enough and do the work. And that may be true, but it is a painful process, and a nearly impossible one if what you want your life to be is at odds with your circumstances. Then it is VERY painful, and the more you try to avoid that pain the more you will fail, the more you will deviate from living that life, and the more your process of building that life will look like a series of unwanted falling apart experiences.

It may sound that not having a project, not wanting to build your life into anything and just letting it run its course is not painful. But things will still fall apart, and we'll still need to learn to stop trying to make it stop doing so.

I don't know yet if this realization will take me down a path a reinventing my life yet again, maybe this time with better objectives and a better grip on my habitual patterns, or if what I need is to face my life as it is and start living it. Some more retrospection is needed. But no matter what I do, I need to be A LOT more gentle with myself, and work on the small changes of mind that will allow me to enjoy what I have and what I do and who I am, and either sit with it or use it as the base for my next leap. And expect the fall out. And continue being gentle through it all.

 Piece of cake, right?  I can do this.

Contemporary Portraits: Emily

There is so much I want to write about this session. About the subtle connection between Emily and John. About his relaxed style and speckled shirt, and her hip haircut and busy life. But I’ll just share with you how Emily’s struggle with something as simple, and as complex, as being in a frame illustrates beautifully why I do what I do.

I approached Emily at the restaurant where she works in town, one of my family’s favorite spots to grab a bite. She was behind the bar, rushing to get orders in, big-framed glasses masquerading her lively eyes, huge hoops dangling from her ears. I could see a bright, energetic woman and I wanted to get her in front of my lens right there, right then. Shining through the heaviness of her odd-hours job on her shoulders; with the strength of her young years, a strength she doesn’t even know she has. I waited for a moment where she grabbed a sip of water and I extended my card to her. I gave her my speech, smiled, and walked away. I can tell she was surprised, most women are when I tell them I want to photograph them, like if they can’t believe that they are worthy to exist in photos.

When we met for our consultation, I run several scenarios for her: come over with friends, her partner, create a situation that felt safe, non-awkward, which I sensed was necessary for a mind like Emily’s to go forward. But she was excited, and brave, and we scheduled the session with the option of her man joining her at the end. I wasn’t that surprised when she called to cancel a couple of days before we were to meet at the studio. She told me her mind was not in the right place to feel beautiful and enjoy the experience. So I stepped aside, and graciously gave her the space to feel what she was feeling. I let her know I was on board if and when she was. I wanted to show her so desperately what I saw, which she couldn’t see, but I had to give her the time she needed to get there herself. The morning of, she texted: “let’s do this”. Or something to that effect.

Sometimes our minds take over the reality of our precious lives. We are bombarded every day with messages that put us down, tell us we are not worthy, make it sound ridiculous that we would have images of ourselves, images that look back at us and remind us of our beauty, our value, our worth. I am in awe of every woman who steps past the enemy lines and agrees to be herself, to be photographed as she is, to make friends with that moment of doubt.

Emily is one of those women.

Warrior Mother, Warrior Daughter

Patrice is not a teacher but she works with educators and she could teach one thing or two about being an example of sweetness and strength. Wise, caring, fiercely fighting for the right to mother her daughter as the lioness that she is. A battle that she won recently, after years of fighting it.

Quinn is a Queen and a fashion lover. She is a warrior who has learned from her mother the precious art of holding space.

It was inspiring and heart warming to have these duo at our studio, helping each other with wardrobe selection, straightening wrinkles, and giggling as they each saw the other face the lens. If somebody had peeked in the door that morning, they would have heard things like "You got this, mom!" and "This is her" and "That color looks great on you", said humorously and confidently at the same time. I look forward to one day, when my own daughter is a teenager, to have this kind of connection and mutual respect for each other's minds and wisdom. It was a beautiful thing to witness.

Be a Boss Lady

April is the month I turned 39. Holding fervently to my 30s, and looking back at all that has happened in my life and my business, I couldn't help it but look forward at my plans for the coming year. April is also the month I gave myself to think about small businesses, including my own, and how I couldn't have made Lightfolly what it is today without the support of all the strong women in mine and my company's life.

One of the greatest pleasures I've had in the last four years is to have had many of those women in my studio. When compiling my Personal Branding portfolio recently, as I prepared the campaign for my upcoming Head Shots Marathon (on April 24th; have you booked your spot yet?!) I realized that many of these women are business owners, and/or represent a brand/organization, and I was privileged to create their head shots, whether they booked a Personal Branding session with me or not. That's the magic of what we do at Lightfolly: book us and you'll walk away with a variety of images, that you can keep as personal keepsakes and professional images.

I want to share these boss ladies with you today. They are the joy of my business.

Trey Sherwood, Executive Director @ Laramie Mainstreet

Jessica Brauer, Communications Coordinator @ Laramie Mainstreet

Vanessa Stines, Baker @ Sweets Cakes and Pastry

Lori Kirk, Owner @ Cowgirl Yarn

Megan Jhonson, Owner and photographer @ Megan Lee Photo

Audrey Jansen, Market Researcher @ SBDC

Melodie Edwards, Reporter @ Wyoming Public Media

Rebecca Cassity, Owner @ Serendipity Confections

Diana Elterman, Owner and Yoga Instructor @ Ahimsa (previously Hot Power Yoga)

Katie Hogarty, Program Director @ Climb Wyoming

Rachelle Barkhurst, Owner @ Rachelle Rose Design

Emily Brown, Co-owner @ Dirtbags

Kodi Davis, Head Baker and Owner @ Sweets Cakes & Pastry

Carly Ann Carruthers, Historic Preservation Specialist @ Laramie Mainstreet

Shelby Page, Baker @ Sweets Cakes & Pastry

Robin McIntyre, Hair Stylist @ Luna Salon & Spa (and Lightfolly)

Devon O'Connell, Attorney at Law @ Pence & MacMillan

Personal Branding: Sweets Cakes and Pastry

I remembered being a child and pretending to be on a photo shoot where my head shot was being taken. I was going to be an actress, and of course that's what actors get, right? Fast forward to 2008 and I am in Grad School working on my resume, which I hated with a passion. It reminded me a little bit of that scene in American Psycho, when the men are at the conference table comparing business cards, except not so cool because we didn't get to choose the paper, and because my adviser would strongly disapproved of a sans-serif font (and there goes my love for Helvetica). I am formally trained as a scientist, and when you are a scientist the image of yourself you present to the world is in your work, not an image of yourself.

I got the privilege of doing the Personal Branding images for the previous owners of Sweets Cakes and Pastry back in 2015. Then Kodi, the new owner, contacted us to get images of her and her employees, an booked one of our packages, including hair and makeup. "The fancy bakery downtown", people call Kodi's store. And it's true, it is fancy and their creations are up-scale (and delicious!). But there is also a fun, playful side to these boss ladies that are part of yet another downtown business where women take the center stage. And I wanted to make sure I could show them in that light.

The day of the session they brought cakes a cupcakes, icing bags and sprinkles, and their iconic bright pink T-shirts with their logo on them. They got to show me (and now you!) their personalities and quirkiness, and we made some great images showcasing them as the talented bakers they are, but also as fierce business owners who serve our community every day.

"I can't wait to work on our company's website now, and add these images to it!" said Kodi to me after she chose her images. Knowing that our images generate excitement in our clients is the cherry on top. Often people ask me "can you shoot a quick photo of me for my website?". The answer, of course, is yes. I can. I am a photographer after all. But if that is what you want, you can ask your uncle Bob or your 5 year old girl to do it for you, and you can even have it for free! If instead what you want are professional images, where we polish your appearance so your true essence and what you have to offer to your clients can shine through, call us for a consultation today. You won't regret investing in your company by getting the best head shots you've ever had.

Intimate Portraits: Kodi

Glasses are sexy. Curves are sexy. Getting out of your comfort zone is incredibly sexy.

Kodi had been thinking of getting some intimate portraits for a while, and when we announced our Valentine's Minis at the beginning of the month, she jumped right in. She wanted to give her hubby quite the surprise, and oh boy, did she! Not because he doesn't know her, or her beauty, or her body. But because when you have a family and you run a business and you are a badass of a lady, it is so easy to put yourself last and to celebrate everybody around you before celebrating yourself.

If you are struggling to find the time, the confidence, the way to put yourself at the top of the priority list, take a look at these images that Kodi has graciously allowed us to share, and then grab a pencil and move your name all the way up there, above the diaper changing and the networking meeting for once: you deserve it.

Intimate Portraits: Erin

I am at the threshold of my 40s. Every new decade seems so promising to me; I rarely struggle with the transition but rather look forward to the possibilities. And that is how Erin is facing her 40s. She has two daughters, a red-furred dog, a quaint little house in the tree area, and she decided it was time to exist in photos and unveil her beauty.

I always delight in women who just are. She was wrapped in white cotton, quietly laying on the mattress while I tested for light, and she would look up at me and blink a couple of times as I gave her directions, then she would pause and smile. "Relax your mouth" I'd say, and she would just be, she would simply exist for that second, crystallized by my lens with the light on her hair, and I could not contain my own smile as I looked at the back of the camera and saw her being, her eyes smiling back at me.

Be like Erin; come celebrate your entry into the 40s with us!

Simply You: Megan

Her eyes. They are so awake. I could tell from the way she moved that she trusted the process and the photographer about to reflect the truth of her skin back to her. It may be because she is a photographer too. And wow, did we laugh. You have no idea.

Megan didn't get images of herself because she is expecting, or needs head shots, or wanted to have prints for future generations to treasure (although they will!). She got images of herself because she wanted to celebrate herself now, today, the way she looks and feels and moves. And maybe to have some intimate portraits to share with the hubby, but I can only share a couple of those here (wink).

How do you dream of being photographed?

Hair by Robin McIntyre
Makeup by Meagan Kelley

Interview: Trey Sherwood

Let’s start with the usual: tell me about your childhood and life, and how the way you were raised influences who you are today.

My dad was in the Air Force for 20 years, and I was born on a base in Mississippi, which I guess means I am a southern lady! But my family moved before I started talking, so I never got a southern accent. I have a brother who is two years younger. We moved a lot; when my dad was gone for weeks or months at a time, it was like living with a single parent. Change was normal, nothing was always the same, but even with all the transitions my brother and I felt really supported by our parents. They were loving, kind, and hard working. They tried to better themselves and our lives so they could offer us more, which I didn’t realized at that time, but looking back I see it. Our grandparents on both sides were influential in our lives. Although we lived all over the country, every summer we would visit my grandparents in Palm Springs, California. We really enjoyed that time, getting to hang out and enjoy the summers with them. Every time I would walk in the room, my grandfather would sing: “Here she comes, Miss America”. I never thought of it as in “a beauty pageant queen,” but as his way to encourage me to do whatever I wanted in life: “If you want to be Miss America, go do it. It doesn’t matter if you are perceived as too short, you go do it.” It is just one example of how my parents and grandparents set me up for having that mindset of “If that’s what you want to do, go do it”. So I grew up without a perception that you could fail, or that failure was a bad thing. Today I’m not afraid to try things. Failure is fine but you get to succeed if you try. Whenever I start working on a new project, I start it thinking that it may take a week, or a year, or twenty years, but I will be successful. That’s just how my brain is wired; it is trained to see a situation knowing that it will result in success, never thinking that failure is an option.

My upbringing has influenced how I interact with people as an adult in terms of not taking time for granted. I define myself as an "Air Force brat," which means I don’t have the concept of being friends with the people I went to kindergarten with. I moved in high school, I moved for college... As a result I value relationships and never take it for granted that they will be long term. I make friends quickly and warm up to people quickly, because when you are a military brat you know that you may not have time to “get around to making friends later”, because they or you may not be there later.

I moved out of my parents’ house to go to college. I went to Piedmont College, a small liberal arts school in North Georgia with no football team, in a dry county. That may explain why most people there were done in four years or less (laughs). Don’t get me wrong, we had a great support system, but there wasn’t much going on, no distractions. I lived in the dorms, and did my undergrad in History, English and Photography. I knew I had no patience to be in a classroom and be a teacher, so I went on to do my Masters in Museum Studies and Public History, at the University of West Georgia. We were close enough to Atlanta that we got to do lots of field work at the Atlanta History Center. It was an amazing opportunity to work in a museum in an urban environment. There were eight students in my class, so we got so much attention. My professors there had such optimism, and they too imparted that idea of “You can do whatever you put your mind to. Work hard and success will follow.”

The day I was graduating, literally, I got a call to come interview for a job with the Wyoming Territorial Prison State Historic Site in Laramie. I flew out, did the interview, got a job offer, went back to Georgia and moved out here. Saying “I’m going to pick up and move to Laramie, WY” was not unusual at all. My brother just moved to Knoxville and my parents picked up and moved there. When my dad was transferred in the Air Force, it was common for us to go into communities where we didn’t know anybody. They didn’t have a support system; we relied on neighbors and the people that we met, for my dad at work, for my brother and me at school. As an adult, that seems okay. I had never been in Laramie, I didn’t have friends or family here, but that was not a concern or a consideration. You go where the work is. It made me very adaptable.

I started working at the prison in July of 2004, and was there for five years before transitioning to Main Street.

Where does your love for history come from?

Who knows. In the middle of all the moving my dad would always get two weeks off in the summer and we would drive from wherever we were living back to southern Minnesota, where both my parents are from. Many times it was a long road trip, so my parents would let my brother and me pick things to do along the way. And I would always say: “I want to go to a museum!” or “I want to go to this random historic site!". My mom would say: “I don’t know where you are getting this from, but okay!”. And they would take the time to stop and let us run around and explore and geek out about it. They were always really supportive, even if they weren’t into it. In seventh grade, my mom told me that I needed to start thinking about what I wanted to do when I grew up. I told her I wanted to find the gravesite of Billy the Kid… I had this odd fascination with Western outlaw culture and its crazy mythology. May be I was watching Young Guns too many times back then, I’m not sure (laughs). So I studied history. But I didn’t want to teach, and when the idea of public history and museums came into focus for me, I knew that was it; that‘s what I wanted to do with my life. All my skills are complementary to the idea of doing work as a researcher and sharing it with the public; trying to bridge professional historical research with how it influences everyday life. That has been the most influential piece of my development: not wanting to work behind closed doors but sharing what you find, your passion, your discovery with your community.

I love history but I don’t have as much time for it now, which makes me sad. Not only the idea of researching something through the past down a rabbit hole; of starting with a question about a person, time, or place, and digging and digging and digging... not knowing where the end is or how many different roads you are going to take. I love the surprise in that. But also the methodology of tracking things down: if I go to this source it’s going to give me a clue. There is something reassuring about that.

How much of that interaction with the public did you get when you were working at the territorial prison?

A lot of my work was doing research at my desk or in the archives, going through objects and cataloguing them, making sure they were in good condition… at some point I started to talk to the objects as if they were people, because I was so lonely. Human interaction is so important for me. In that sense, I’m not surprised that I transitioned into my current position as the Director of Laramie Main Street, because I was missing relating with people and the sense of community that the job at the prison didn’t have.

Tell me about Laramie Main Street; how you got to work there and what was it before you came along?

I didn’t even know what it was before I applied for the job. It turns out that they started in 2005, and since then they’ve had the same mission, they’ve been focused on economic development, historic preservation, social vitality, but their structure was so volatile in the beginning. It started because the city (elected officials, city staff, businesses, building owners downtown) was interested in an organization that could bring to fruition a model of economic development for our community. There was great momentum in the formative years; everyone had high hopes for it. It was just circumstantial that they went through five directors in the first five years: somebody got sick, somebody didn’t like the weather, somebody’s husband moved and he had the good insurance so they followed his job... In 2010 the former director asked me to apply, and I don’t think the community knew what the organization was about and what it did back then. I had to do a lot of digging to find out exactly what it was doing and how my skill set could fit in. Once I took the job I realized there was a perception that Laramie Main Street was not as established as an economic development organization so even today, when people define what a Main Street manager does, they say things like: “you plan parties,” or “you do clean up days and pick up cigarette buds,” and “you apply for street closure permits...” That is a very small part of what I and my peers do! I am recruiting businesses, growing jobs, making an impact on the economy… For years I had to fight to make people understand that Main Street is an economic development organization, equal to the Laramie Chamber Business Alliance or the Wyoming Small Business Development Center, etc. I sense a change in the last two years, but before then it was an absolute struggle to be taken seriously. I very much kept going back to the “Fake it ‘til you make it” motto: I would dress the part, take my seat at the table, and memorize my data so I could be quick to respond. Now, every meeting I go to with the City Council or a partner organization, I know exactly how many businesses are in downtown, how many we recruited, how many jobs have been created, how much growth and how much investment has taken place for whatever period is relevant, and I can answer questions that many others at the table can’t. 

That’s why you are the force-to-be-reckoned with that you are! I remember the first time somebody talked to me about you: they referred to you as “Momma Trey.” I immediately envisioned you as this powerhouse; this hen with chicks under her wings, making thing happens for our town against the Wyoming winds…

(laughs - funny now 'cause I have chickens!!!) I don’t ever think that something happens because of just one person. The change in the organization has been a combination of having outstanding board members, many of which were here in 2005 and are still involved today, holding on to that vision, holding me accountable, pushing and encouraging me… and new people from the community bringing up something interesting that they want happening and asking how they can influence the development of downtown, lend a hand, jump in. The City Council supported Main Street in 2005 and they do even more so now. There is a great crew of employees and volunteers lending hands. The support system, the organization, and I have created the success.

In terms of how people see me, I appreciate how they describe me. Sometimes I reflect back; for the most part I have a good laugh. I don’t use the word powerhouse to describe myself and I don’t think of myself as nurturing. I think I am a hot mess sometimes! I do recognize and claim the word passionate. My persona, how I embrace life, how I am with my friends, how I laugh, how I giggle, how I work, it’s all passionately. I work hard with my team and consider myself a cheerleader: for our community, our businesses, our buildings. I am a cheerleader for downtown; I go in and add my passion to the situation that is presented to me and hope that that opens the door for something to happen. I am really uncomfortable with the idea that “I” get stuff done and always laugh when somebody says “Trey did this.” Again, it is never one person. People think that when I insist in addressing the whole team I am being nice to recognize the volunteers and my staff, but I am not just being nice, I absolutely believe it to be true. There is no way one person alone can get things done in this world, it doesn’t happen that way. The problem with this idea of “powerhouse” is that it doesn’t leave any room in the conversation for the reality of the hard stuff. It sounds like magic just happened. Gary Negich, President of First Interstate Bank, did an interview with the Boomerang a few weeks ago and called me a magician. And I thought that it is great that it looks so easy, but what about the hard pieces? It is not just me making this big magic happen, it is a whole team working and failing, and not letting that failure stop us from going forward.

I recognize that, working for a nonprofit, you have to talk about the good parts, about what worked, because you want to show that the money and resources you receive brought success. But that is not the whole story. I think Carly* is the only one who knows where I fail; most people think we just get stuff done, just like that (snaps fingers.)

People may give you more credit than you have, but I think you give yourself less credit than you and your magic deserve…

That will be my next nickname. Big magic momma (laughs.) I gain a lot of strength from people around me. They say you are attracted to things in other people that you wish for yourself, and for me having an engaging team of people around me is what is defined as my success. I take strength from my friends, my peers, my coworkers. Who you surround yourself with helps define who you are. I struggle with finding a balance between acknowledging my personal success and the team’s. If I stop and think about myself or the word “I”, I feel so uncomfortable. It makes me squirm.

Why?

Wow, I don’t feel comfortable even thinking about it. I don’t do a good job in the work-life balance either, that’s why I have dogs: they need very basic things and they distract me from my work. I don’t practice self-care, I don’t put myself first, I don’t make time for myself. I know it is the healthy thing to do, but even when forced by external circumstances I struggle with nurturing myself. In June of last year my Achilles snapped. At first I thought I had twisted my ankle and I tried to ignore it, but my husband insisted in driving me to the hospital and it happened to be that I had to have surgery. It was the first time in my life I had surgery, the first time I was immobilized in any kind of way, the first time in my adult life that I had to depend on someone else for my care. It was so challenging. But I didn’t really take any time off. I sat on the couch and worked from home. Friends brought me knitting supplies and movie recommendations, they encouraged me to use this as an excuse to binge-watch Netflix and teach myself how to knit. After two hours I couldn’t do it anymore! Working on job-related projects was more fulfilling. A business owner told me “Now that you are forced to sit still I want you to think about what your life would be like if you played as hard as you worked.” It’s been almost a year now and I still haven’t figured that out. I find so much joy in my work, I get up in the morning and I am so excited to tackle something… What would it be like if I… hiked as hard as I work? Would I be climbing mountains in foreign countries? Who knows. I don’t make time for play and I don’t put as much energy into it as I do into my work, and that seems fine because I am very fulfilled by what I do. But I know it is not necessarily healthy over the long term. I am afraid of burn out. I just celebrated my seven year anniversary with Main Street and I am proud of that; most directors last three years on average, and the Laramie ones before me lasted one. But I do ask myself how long I can do it. What needs to happen for me to retire from this job, and what does that look like?

Do you leave work at 5 pm most days?

No! (laughs.) I struggle horribly with the 8-to-5 schedule and I am judgmental of people who stick to it. It’s not about the hours; it’s not about the clock. Sometimes people tell me at 4 pm: “Go, you’ve worked really hard this week, go do something nice for yourself,” but I can’t get myself to do it because I would not say that to somebody else. And if I do it as a one-time thing, as a treat, I feel guilty. If I take more than one hour for myself I start feeling guilty. How do you erase your genetics? The stereotypical mid-west work ethics is just part of who I am. It doesn’t matter how many hours it takes to get the job done, my philosophy, my father’s philosophy, my grandfather’s philosophy is: “Work until the job is done.” If it takes one hour great; if it takes two weeks that’s what it takes.

Today, people ask how is it that I am so successful. The answer to that question that never gets verbalized is “I beat up on myself so that everything in my life is successful but me, as an individual.” My husband has a job that he loves very much too; we are both absolute workaholics. We get so much fulfillment from our jobs that our relationship revolves around giving each other room and permission to work and making life decisions around that, like deciding to not have children. I have 270 children: that is how many businesses are downtown.

What is your view of women in our society today, of the role they play vs the role men play?

I have been thinking about what I’ve heard among my Laramie female friends recently, some raw and real stories from local business owners, and I feel like women, in particular here in Laramie, have so much to bring to the table. We as a group can’t wait for somebody to make space for us, we have to force our way to the table, take a seat, claim ownership and act like we belong there and know that our voices are essential. Ladies: don’t take “no” for an answer! We need to see more balance between men and women on non-profit boards, the UW boards of trustees, and in the legislature… We have the ability to create change and goodness in society. For a multitude of reasons we don’t see enough women at the table, raising their voices and saying “I can make a difference, get out of my way.” I want to encourage other women to be powerful and to be change agents, and I hope I’m setting a good example for other women.

Looking around at the National Main Street conferences, eighty percent of the directors attending are women. Because of the nature of this job, there are not a lot of men in this field. And that makes me think about my first year on my job with the State of Wyoming, working as a historian out at the prison, I had so many people comment on my age and my gender. Over and over and over again. They would say things like: “Aren’t you too young to be doing this job?” or “I think this is the first time a women has had this position.” I never understood why those things were relevant to what I was doing. I heard that so often and I tried to brush it off and walk out of the conversation. Looking back, I wish I had called it out every time, but I was so new in my career… Towards the end I was in the position to get an advancement and my supervisor told me that he would never allow a woman to have the job that I was going after. I couldn't believe that someone had the nerve to tell me I couldn't do something, much less because of my gender! I went through the process of filing complaints with HR but nothing changed, so I left that job. Most people don’t realize that I left because I was told that as a woman, I would never advance. It seems asinine in this century, this time, and this place something like that could happen. It makes me wonder how many other women has something like this happened to?

Good question. Any final thoughts to our community members?

I want to take away the mystery: anybody can be as successful as I am. I don’t think there is a barrier for that. People around me striving and working to make the community better pushes me to do more and be better myself. There is room for multiple “powerhouses” to exist in a community, and for them to encourage each other and push each other to go further. I love collaboration. If somebody out there has an idea for our downtown, walk in the door and talk to me. It’s always so exciting when that happens.

And back to the idea of being real and honest, I want to ask people to leave room for both the failure and the success we all face everyday. What we express publicly may be different from what we feel behind closed doors. Most people would say I am optimistic, passionate, happy, always cheery, but I am an absolute closet pessimist! I have gotten my grandmother's worry gene like nobody’s business. Often, when I’m by myself I get sad or worried or depressed, although I never put this forward as my public persona. When you are this emotionally and passionately driven, the positive pushes you forward while the worry is a frenzy that cannot be described rationally. When I'm feeling down, I always go back to my favorite phrase “Fake it ‘til you make it”! At the end of the day, being a workaholic and finding fulfillment in my job provides a distraction so I don’t have so much time to worry on the one "oops" that’s bringing me down.

The best advice I ever got was from Jodi Shea, a local attorney and board member of Main Street. She is one of the smartest, brave, calm, and collected persons I’ve ever met. She said to me: “When you are faced with an annoyance, a problem(real or perceived), a mistake, a failure, somebody else projecting their issues on you, think and ask yourself: is this going to affect me in an hour, in a day, in a month, or in a year”? This question quickly puts the whole situation into perspective for me! If somebody walks into my office to complain about a bike rack location, I tell myself: “This is not a life or death issue, it’s an annoyance, and it might be an annoyance for a day or a week until we get the bike rack moved. It’s not a critical issue like, having to have surgery” (laughs.) And then I can let it go.